Ep 144: Why Evenings Feel Harder in Fall & Winter — and How to Stay Alcohol-Free

When the sun sets early and my energy dips before dinner, I know how tempting it can feel to reach for something — a drink, a snack, or just a little escape.

In this episode, I’m sharing what’s really going on in your brain and body during those darker months, and five simple, faith-based ways to keep your peace when it’s dark by 5 p.m.

We’ll talk about comfort, cravings, and creating cozy, alcohol-free rhythms that help you end your day calm instead of craving.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome & Seasonal Struggle
• 2:56 Biology Behind Evening Cravings
• 4:47 Five Faith-Based Evening Strategies
• 5:35 Morning Light: Reset Your Rhythm
• 8:20 Redefine Unwind With Rituals
• 9:52 Move Gently To Shift Mood
• 11:21 Anchor Evenings In The Sacred
• 13:05 Embrace The Slower Season
• 16:05 Personal Reflection On Comfort

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the go-to resource for women seeking to have a deeper understanding of the role alcohol plays in their lives. Women who are looking to drink less or not at all for any reason. I am your host, Christy Walker. I'm a wife, mom, and a joy-filled Catholic. And I am the Catholic sobriety coach. And I am so glad you're here. You know what's coming that time of year when it's dark by dinner, your energy dips before you even start cooking, and everything in you says, I just need something to take the edge off. Yep. The clocks are changing again for most of us. The light fades, the days shorten, and that 5 p.m. hour suddenly feels a little bit heavier. If you've ever stood in your kitchen thinking, I just want a glass of wine to make this feel easier, or I deserve something after the day I've had, you are not alone. There's something about that early darkness that pokes at all of our weak spots. You've been on all day, making decisions, meeting needs, holding everything together, and your brain is like, okay, we've earned our reward now, right? And then boom, the craving shows up. But here's the truth: just because the world gets darker earlier doesn't mean your spirit or your rhythm have to. So in today's episode, we are talking about how to prepare for the time change before it catches you off guard, especially if evenings have been your danger zone for overdrinking, emotional eating, or numbing out. Plus, the winters are just dark for everyone, even if you don't experience a time change. So we're going to unpack what's happening in your brain and body during this seasonal shift. And I'll share five faith-based practical ways to keep your evenings calm, connected, and alcohol-free, even when the sun disappears before six or five, or four. Think of this episode as your cozy, realistic guide to finding peace in the darker months, grounded in faith, supported by science, and full of grace for wherever you are right now. So grab a mug of something warm, light a candle if you want to set the mood, and let's talk about how to keep your peace and your sense of humor, even when the light fades early. All right, let's start with the why. Because it's not just that you hate winter or you've lost your willpower. When daylight fades, your body's chemistry actually shifts. Your brain starts releasing melatonin, the time for bed hormone, long before you're ready to crawl under the covers. At the same time, your serotonin levels drop because sunlight helps regulate it. Less serotonin equals lower mood, more fatigue, and yes, more cravings. So by the time you hit that 5 p.m. hour, your brain is doing the emotional equivalent of waving a white flag and saying, I'm tired, I'd like a cookie, a nap, or a drink. Maybe all three. It's not a moral failure. It's biology. Your reward system, that limbic part of your brain that's always looking for comfort, is firing up and searching for a shortcut. The problem is alcohol seems like a shortcut to calm, but it's really a detour. You get that quick dopamine hit, a short burst of relief, but then crash. Your serotonin dips, your sleep gets disrupted, and you wake up more tired and irritable than before. That's why it's so easy to get stuck in a loop. The darkness leads to stress, the stress leads to drinking, the drinking leads to regret, and the regret leads to repeating. But here's the hope. You can't break that loop. You just need to know what's happening and set yourself up before your brain goes on autopilot. So let's talk about five faith-filled brain-savvy ways to build better evenings. The first thing is to start your day with light and a little purpose. If darkness seals your energy at night, you've got to front load your morning with light. Even 10 minutes of natural light within an hour of waking helps your brain regulate dopamine and serotonin, your built-in mood stabilizers. Dr. Andrew Huberman, who happens to be my favorite neuroscience professor to quote, says that morning light sets your circadian rhythm, helps you stay alert during the day, and sleep better at night. So step outside with your coffee, even if it's cold, and let that light hit your eyes and say, okay, Lord, new day, new mercies. So what if you're like me and you live somewhere where the winter is cloudy and rainy most of the time? Well, even on cloudy days, outdoor light is 10 to 50 times brighter than most indoor lighting. Your eyes don't need the direct sun to send that morning light signal to your brain. What they need is ambient outdoor light because the light intensity measured in lux is still high enough to reset your circadian rhythm and boost serotonin production. For example, indoor lighting is about a 300 to 500 lux, where cloudy outdoor light is actually 5,000 to 10,000 lux. Bright sunlight, of course, is going to be best, and that's 50,000 to 100,000 lux. But even if it's raining or completely overcast, just stepping outside for 5 to 10 minutes in the morning helps your brain register, oh, we're awake now. You don't have to stare at the sky or get sunburned. Just get outdoors where the light is brighter than it is inside. The second way to build better evenings is to redefine what unwind means. Let's be honest, unwind is often code for I need to escape, I need to know. And look, we've all been there. You're tired, you're overstimulated, and your brain says, let's just turn things up for a while. But escaping doesn't restore peace, it just delays the discomfort. So instead of escaping, try exhaling. Create a wind-down ritual that actually comforts you, body and soul. Here's what that might look like. Pour sparkling water with lime or a mocktail in your prettiest glass. Seriously, the glassware was never the problem. Light a candle that smells like calm instead of chaos. Play music that reminds your nervous system We are home now, we are safe, and now we are moving into the wind down part of our evening. You're not giving up your ritual, you're redeeming it, you're making it better. And as you take that first sip of whatever's in your glass, try whispering to yourself I did enough today, I don't have to earn rest, and will feel so good in the morning if I choose not to have alcohol this evening. That one sentence can truly calm your nervous system. Just give it a try. Now the third way is to move a little, even when you don't feel like it. So here's something funny. Your body can't tell the difference between I'm tired and I'm sedentary. When it's dark and cold, it's so tempting to go straight into pajama mode. I'm guilty of this. I love to cozy up in my joggers and a big sweatshirt. But gentle movement is going to change everything. It tells your body we're not shutting down, we're shifting gears. You don't need a fancy workout or to burn off your dinner. All you need to do is move enough to release tension and boost your dopamine naturally. So that can be a lot of different things, but what that might mean for you is a 10-minute walk after dinner. It's a bonus if you pray as you go or maybe you call a friend. You can stretch in the kitchen while your pasta is boiling. You can dance to worship music while folding laundry. And yes, I've personally done the dance to Forrest Frank song, Your Way is Better. If you haven't seen it, look it up because every time you hear the song, you will want to do those little dance moves too. It's a great way to release tension and just kind of reset those neurotransmitters. And it's so fun too. If you can laugh, you can move. And if you can move, you can totally shift your mood. Now, the fourth thing is to anchor your evenings in something sacred, something that you are going to look forward to, something that fills your cup. Now, this one's my favorite. Evenings don't feel empty because you're missing wine. They feel empty because you're missing meaning. After a long day, your heart doesn't need more noise or numbing. What it actually needs is connection. So make space for something sacred. Light a candle and read a short scripture verse. Write down three things you're grateful for. You can pray a decade of the rosary or a full rosary. You can send a quick check-in to your accountability partner or text a praying emoji in your group chat. But the goal is not perfection, it's presence. When you fill that 5 to 7 p.m. window with truth and purpose, your craving loses its grip. And bonus, your brain starts associating that time with peace, not pressure. You're literally renewing your brain. It's Romans 12, 2 in action. And then the fifth thing, the last thing, is to embrace the slower season intentionally, not begrudgingly. This season is not about punishment. It's permission. You don't have to fill every quiet evening or fight the early dark. You can let it slow you down. The world rushes and God restores. You might find that this is the season to go to bed earlier. Simplify your meals. Yeah, take out that crock pot. That's one of my favorite things. Read instead of scroll. Journal by candlelight. Breathe between sentences. Maybe God's inviting you into stillness and not productivity. Psalm 27:1 says, The Lord is my light and my salvation. Whom shall I fear? So when the darkness creeps in, don't fight it. Light your candle, wrap yourself in a blanket, and let the quiet become your teacher. You're allowed to slow down. That's not weakness, it's wisdom. Here's a confession. I don't really feel the pool of alcohol anymore. It's been decades and that desire is long gone. But I do still crave comfort sometimes, usually around that 5 p.m. window. It might look like snacking when I'm not hungry or mindlessly scrolling just for a minute. Why? Because my brain's looking for a little dopamine, that feel-good chemical that dips when the day winds down. After hours of being productive and focused and on, it's natural to want a reward or a transition. But the truth is what I actually need in those moments, it's not sugar or scrolling. What I need is relief. It's a pause, a breath, something that tells my nervous system, you're done for the day, you can rest. So now when that urge hits, I take it as a signal, not a problem. It's just my body asking for care and my mind is asking for calm. And instead of fighting it, I answer it differently. A walk, a prayer, music, a stretch, or a cup of tea. That's how peace is built. One small intentional response at a time. So when the sun sets early this season, don't panic. Prepare. You can absolutely create your own rhythm, protect your peace, and meet your need for comfort in ways that truly fill you, not drain you. Because the goal isn't to never crave comfort. We're humans, it's going to happen, but it is to learn how to comfort yourself with things that create life instead of taking it away. If this episode gave you something to think about or just reminded you that you're not the only one trying to make 5 p.m. feel a little less chaotic, I'd love to have you join us inside the Sacred Sobriety Lab. It's where faith, brain science, and real community come together to help you create a life that feels calm, purposeful, and peaceful, with or without the glass. You'll find women walking the same road, asking the same question, and building the same kind of steady evenings that you're craving. Come and join us at SacredSobriety Lab.com and if you have a friend who could use a little more peace this season, share this episode with her. Let's be the women who keep our light on even when the sun sets early. Well, that does it for this episode of the Catholic Sobriety Podcast. I hope you enjoyed this episode, and I would invite you to share it with a friend who might also get value from it as well. And make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a thing. I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach, and if you would like to learn how to work with me or learn more about the coaching that I offer, visit my website, the Catholic Sobriety Coach dot com. Follow me on Instagram at Catholic Sobriety.